Nesting as therapy

Well, things are cruising right along around here! We are 1 week from our EDD and as ready as we are going to get! I even managed to clean out that pesky tupperware cabinet last week. I am confident I can find more things to knock out around here, but as far as prep for Ralphie, we are all set!!!

Part of my nesting involved cleaning out my IVF cabinet which I had been putting off for my entire pregnancy. At first I suppose that was out of fear, but then it just became a fixture of my life and honestly, hard for me to let go of. I did coordinate a donation with another girl who is OOP and that felt great and yet I still felt the need to hang onto some of it. I donated meds that were set to expire, but anything that had at least 6mo left, I boxed up and put away along with all my sharps, gauze, alcohol pads etc... I don't really know why. It is pretty unrealistic that I would be ready to cycle again in 6 short months, especially since I plan to breastfeed for a year and yet, I just couldn't get rid of all those meds. It felt so familiar to handle them - I could smell them, I could feel the sting of the needle and the burn of the meds entering my bloodstream. It was bizarre.

As close as I am to holding my baby in my arms, I still have a big part of IF inside of me. I still cry every time I hear one of my IVF anthems - Her Diamonds by Rob Thomas, Broken by Lifehouse and Shattered by OAR bring me right back to my darkest days and reminds me of how much I have to be thankful for this holiday season. To all of those still in the trenches, I am thinking of you and wishing you strength during the holidays and hope for the new year!

Here it is! The 39w update and I am thinking it might be the last one...hopefully those words don't come back to bite me!

How am I feeling? Ready to meet my little one! A little sad that this part of my journey is coming to an end. I will miss being pregnant and hope I can experience it again some day. Still peeing an insane number of times per day! Fetal movement is sometimes painful as he/she runs out of room.

Milestones: The final days are here! It has passed me by in a flash...

Signs of Labor: YUP! I lost my mucus plug/had bloody show this morning!! Have had more braxton hicks over the past few days. At my 38w appt, I was 90% effaced, cervix was midline and soft and the baby was -2 station. No dilation. If I don't go into labor this weekend, I have my next internal on Monday! I know all this could mean nothing more than hurry up and wait, but it could also mean that labor is right around the corner. Either way, my body is working hard to get ready!

Cravings: I have been really hungry lately! Still eating my waffles daily and drinking my chocolate milk :)

What do I miss? Putting on my own socks :)

What am I looking forward to? The big day! So much anticipation...

Weight gain: 9lbs total - I have gained 4lbs in the past 2 weeks and MW thinks it is mostly fluid as my legs have been a little swollen. BP is perfect!!

What am I doing to help labor along? Drinking Raspberry Leaf Tea - at least 2 cups a day- and taking 1500mg of Evening Primrose Oil daily. Walking, having sex, bouncing on the yoga ball, doing squats, and eating spicy foods!
When does the family arrive? Wednesday!! I can't wait!

So that's it. I am thinking I may go into labor over the weekend - the 18th is my Dad's bday and he has been deceased since 2000, so that would be kind of special. We are also expecting a winter storm this weekend and that would be appropriate for our little snowbaby!

Thank you to everyone who responded to our poll and took a guess about Ralphie's birthday!

I am wishing all of you a very happy holiday season - may all your dreams come true!

The end is in sight...

It is December. OH.MY.GAWD. It is DECEMBER!!!!!! Ralphie is on the clock, time is ticking, we are on deck, insert your own cliche here...

Any way you look at it, this baby is making his/her grand entrance this month. Where has the time gone? I feel like it was just April and I was a mere 4w pregnant. December felt so very far away and now here it is, December 1st and I am 2 days away from being full term and 23 days away from my EDD.

I have really loved being pregnant. I have been blessed by a relatively easy pregnancy and despite the Chipotle incident and the rather long bout of all day sickness, I don't feel I have a lot to complain about. It has been a peaceful time. In true only child fashion, I have loved all the pampering and attention from Sean, friends, family and strangers. Baby showers are the best thing ever! People have been incredibly generous and we are pretty much set. I promise nursery pics soon - we are putting the finishing touches on the nursery this week.

The baby's movement continues to blow my mind on a daily basis, as does the fact that in just 9 months I have grown tiny little human being. How crazy is that??? What started as just 2 cells in a petri dish is now a perfectly formed human who will enter the world any day now. It's incredible.

I have no idea what the future holds for us, but I would love to be pregnant again. It has really been a special time in my life.

We have been busy little bees over the past few weeks. Our dear friends threw us a couple's shower two weeks ago and we had a wonderful time celebrating with our friends and neighbors. I was happy for Sean that he got to celebrate with the boys. It is funny to see all of guy friends that have little ones giving Sean Daddy advice. They were so into it! My aunt kept commenting on how times have changed and how much more involved men seem to be in pregnancy and parenting than they ever were in her generation. I think it is a wonderful thing. Sean is so very excited to be a Daddy and he is on board with all my crazy notions regarding parenting ;)

We have been cleaning and nesting and organizing like crazy and we are feeling like we are just about ready for this little one's arrival. We did not travel to Buffalo for Thanksgiving this year so we spent the holiday just the two of us. Sean spent most of the day assembling baby gear while I cooked a traditional dinner. We ate by candlelight reflecting on how much our lives have changed in just one year.

I still need to pack my bag and the baby's bag and we need to install the car seat. We can't install it until our glider arrives because we need to put down the seats in the truck to get it home. It should be here any day. I have some nesting type projects that I would love to knock out, but nothing pressing, unless organizing the tupperware cabinet is a requirement for bringing the baby home. I would also love to do a little holiday decorating. I need to practice my hypnobirthing techniques and get myself in the right mindset for my med free birth at the birthing center. I feel like we have been so wrapped up in preparing the house, that I have neglected my own preparation a little bit.

36/37 week update:

How am I feeling? Like I have to pee CONSTANTLY! I told Sean I am taking up residence in the bathroom. I must go 20+ times per day, sometimes immediately after going, I feel the urge to go again. The Midwife tells me this is because the baby has dropped. It is not a pleasant feeling. Even less pleasant is when you tinkle a little when you sneeze - fun stuff! It has only happened once, but one time too many in my book.

Milestones: I am considered full term this Thursday and my EDD is just 23 days away!

Cravings: Still drinking a lot of milk and I eat 2 waffles every single day and have been for months now.

Aversions: Chicken is gross to me again :(

What do I miss: Sleeping through the night - I guess I can kiss those days goodbye for a looooooong time!

What am I looking forward to? Meeting this little one. I cannot wait to find out if this is a girl or a boy and to see his/her sweet face for the first time.

Weight gain: Holding steady at 5lbs gained in total. I even switched to whole milk and added a protein shake a day to my diet. I think this baby has my metabolism on super speed and I am not really complaining about that.

Signs of labor: At my 35w appt I was 80% effaced, baby dropped and cervix was nice and soft. No dilation yet! I have also been a little crampy and have a heaviness in my pelvis on and off.

What am I doing to help labor along? Drinking Raspberry Leaf Tea - at least 2 cups a day- and taking 1500mg of Evening Primrose Oil daily. Both per my midwives instructions. I need to start walking daily and using my yoga ball.

So there you have it!!! I've added a poll so you can predict Ralphie's gender, so please play along. Also, feel free to make a guess about when Ralphie will arrive when you comment. I think I am going early - the week of 12/14. My mom thinks on or about 12/10 and Sean thinks any day this week...What do you think? Early? Right on time? Late?

One of the best days of my life!

I'm back! No excuses, just a terrible blogging slump. Life certainly has been eventful in the almost 2 months since I have graced you with my presence. Time continues to fly by and tomorrow I will be 32 weeks pregnant! Can you even believe it? This little one will be here sooner than later, but hopefully right on time.

One of the biggest events in my life in the past few months was my baby shower! I can honestly say it was of the best days of my life - right up there with our wedding day and the day we found out we were pregnant. Sunday could not have been more perfect. My mom, my aunt, my childhood best friend and my mother-in-law were our hostesses and they did an amazing job. Everything was just perfect. The colors were sage green and chocolate brown to match our bedding, which I changed since my last post. I ended up going with Carter's Elephant Stitch bedding and I love it! The food was yummy, the favors were adorable and the cake - oh my goodness - it was the talk of the town! The favors were baby food jars with green and brown M&Ms, wrapped in tulle with green and brown ribbon and a little elephant tag. The centerpieces were mums and everything coordinated beautifully!

We were so blessed by the generosity of our family and friends. Little Ralphie is already one spoiled little babe. It is crazy to look around and have all this baby stuff in my house!!! The nursery furniture will be here a week from Saturday and then we can really get down to business.

Some of the highlights from my shower were the cake, which I really cannot say enough about, and some really touching personal gifts. Sean's Aunt Kathleen in Ireland was famous for her gorgeous baby blankets and sweaters. She was sick with cancer for many years and passed away the day after our wedding almost 6 years ago. Little did we know she had already made us a sweater and blanket and set them aside. Imagine our surprise to open such a beautiful package at our shower. The tears were flowing...The sweater and blanket are just gorgeous. I do not have a good photo of them, but I will try to remember to take a photo and share it. Along those same lines, my Great Aunt Sara has been in failing health for some time, and shortly after our wedding she began making us a gorgeous blanket. She was able to attend the shower, but her health is poor. Her daughter said this blanket is her last. Finally, Amanda who is 29w pregnant and now living in Maine (sniff) was unable to make the trip but it didn't stop her from sending me an amazing package from Piecemeal People. She made me a pair of elephants which match the bedding to a T and an incredible piece which says "hope". It is just amazing and captures perfectly this journey. Many of you may remember that we coined 2009 "The Year of Hope" and so it has been. The addition of "hope" to the nursery could not be more fitting. All in all, I could not have asked for a more special day.

A 32w update:

How am I feeling? Fantastic! An occasional bout of heartburn and some tingling in my hips at night is about all I have to report. BP is great. Feeling very fortunate in this department!

Milestones I am well into my 3rd tri and time is flying. If I were to go into labor now, the baby has a 95% of survival, which is incredibly reassuring. The baby weighs around 4lbs and is about 16in. long! The movement I can see and feel is unreal!

Cravings Milk - drinking a gallon per week. YUM

Aversions - None!!!

What do I miss? Being able to go more than 1 hour without a trip to the bathroom. I tallied my bathroom trips for 24 hrs and I went 17 times!!! Being able to put my socks and shoes on comfortably.

What am I looking forward to? Working on the nursery this weekend! Putting all the baby stuff in its place. Our couple's shower in 2 weeks. Of course, meeting this little one - but not quite yet!

Weight gain - 4lbs at my 30w midwife appt. I was told to start eating more calories so I am working on it. I definitely got my fair share at my shower :)

What do we think we are having? A boy and that seemed to be the general consensus at my shower. We even got a few boy specific gifts and I am not sure why...

Signs of labor? None!!

So, that it is my update. Thank you to those of you who checked in on me during my absence! Hope you are all well.

Back to Reality

Long time, no see! So many new developments, I don't even know where to start...

We had a wonderful babymoon in Key Biscayne. We relaxed, relaxed, relaxed. We spent each day at the pool where I read my share of Sook.ie Stackhouse novels while lounging or sitting in the glorious salt water pool. I got some sun, but I was diligent with the sunscreen, shade and drinking my water. We scored some nice upgrades along the way, including an oceanfront suite with a kitchen because our room was not ready when we arrived. The kitchen was great - we went shopping the first day and stocked up on lunch stuff, snacks, soda etc... It ended up being a big budget saver. The hotel also gave us a lovely welcome basket since we were celebrating our anniversary and babymoon - 2 hats, a beach bag and a Mama Mio pregnancy relaxation candle. We had a wonderful spa pampering day too! I really enjoyed all the down time with Sean. We talked and dreamed and planned what the next phase of our lives will be like and imagined how vacation with a little one will be. It was just what we needed and I am so glad that Sean surprised me with a trip.


Another major highlight of the trip is that Sean & I got to meet Christi and her sweet baby Cate from "Our Journey". Her blog is private now, but I know many of you "know" her and her long journey to parenthood, made possible by the miracle men and women at CCRM! We met at Pan.era for a few hours and it was such a treat! Christi and I connected in the spring of 2007 during my first IVF and her 2nd. She has been a huge support of advice and support for me and it was really incredible to finally meet someone I consider such an important person in my life.


Ever since the 20w point, I feel like time in flying by! I cannot believe I am now 24w2d pregnant-that is 6 months, folks- and I have just over 15w to go! It has been a serious reality check. I think there was still some level of disbelief that I was actually having a baby any time soon, but now, I feel movement all the time, Sean can feel movement daily, my belly is growing large and you can see it move and jump and all of the sudden it just feels so real. Add on to those tangibles the fact that we start our 5 week hypnobirthing class on Thursday, we have an appt set up to interview a pediatrician, my baby shower invites go out this week, we registered the other day and the fact that the calendar reading September and I find myself in awe most days that this is my life!

While we were registering at BRU on Thursday, I was all smiles - beaming, in fact! I kept saying, I can't believe it is our turn! I can't believe we are picking out things for our baby. I can't believe in a month our home is going to be filled with baby gear and then shortly there after our very own, real live BABY, our son our daughter!!!! When did this happen? Someone pinch me please?!?!

Speaking of registering, after spending countless hours searching the internets for gender neutral bedding that fit my style, I finally picked a set from www.babybedding.com and I looooooove it! The pattern is sage damask and our nursery colors will be sage green and chocolate brown. I think the damask is feminine, but the colors and accent stripes are masculine and I am confident I can make it more of one or the other once we know if Ralphie is a he or a she. The walls in the nursery are already a khaki color and it matches quite nicely, so we have decided not to repaint at this point. Although, I must admit, visions of a sage green top wall with white chair rail and chocolate brown below the chair rail dance in my head, it really is not necessary, especially since we are leasing this home and have no idea how long we will be here. I am so excited to get started with decorating, but my furniture is still a few weeks out and my shower is not until October 25th. Patience, patience, patience!

My mom is doing an incredible job with the shower planning & I am so excited for the big day. She is using the chocolate brown and sage as the colors, my invites have a sage damask background and she has all kinds of cute ideas for centerpieces and favors. 7 weeks from today - eeek!!! Again I say, someone pinch me, please!!!

So, for your reading pleasure, my 24w update!

How am I feeling? Wonderful! I have zero complaints right now. This is definitely the honeymoon stage of pregnancy for me. I also feel really good in my own body, I am not self-conscious about my weight or how I look and that is such a great feeling. One that I have not had in a long time, thanks to my IF weight gain. I really like my pregnant body!


Milestones: 24w - otherwise known as viability day and although I take a teensy bit of comfort in that, it is not really a milestone to celebrate in my mind. We hope and pray that Ralphie stays safe and sound for many more weeks... The belly is moving from the outside! One night on vacation, we put the remote control on my belly and Ralphie was bouncing it all over the place. It was very cool :) Oh - I passed my 1 hour glucose test!!!

Cravings? Still not really having any, but I have been more interested in sweets than I was early on.

Aversions? Still have not been brave enough to try to eat chicken, although with football season upon us, some wings may be in my future!

What do I miss? A glass of wine - especially while we were on vacation.

What am I looking forward to? Our hypnobirthing classes, which start this Thursday! My shower - 7 weeks and counting!!! My first official appt with the midwives at the birthing center at the end of the month!

Weight gain - officially 3.5lbs according the the scale at my Ob's office.

What do we think we are having? Still thinking a boy. We say "he" with such certainty you would think we saw boy parts on the u/s!

So, that is what has been going on in my world. Still feeling very blessed and overjoyed. I have lots I need to say and plan to try to put it all down in the coming weeks...

Two Tickets to Paradise...and pics :)

Whew! What a weekend! Friday was an absolutely wonderful day. We started the day with our level 2 ultrasound and it was amazing! Ralphie was not being overly cooperative and seemed to be having a good time hiding out behind my belly button making it difficult for the tech to get all the images she needed. She did capture some really cute images for us, but I am not sure she was able to get everything she needed of the heart and digestive tract. She said she would leave it up to the OB to decide if he needs to see more. The u/s lasted about 45 min and it was pure joy for us. She was able to go back and forth between 3D images and regular images at the click of a button, so that was pretty cool. Everything looked great to us, but what the heck do we know? I will feel assume that is the case unless I hear differently! Now for some cute pics!


These are totally Sean's legs and my BIG feet! Sean sits like this all the time. My mom said they look like boy legs all the way, and toddler legs at that. In the picture on the right, my little trouble maker appears to be giving the world the finger! Too funny! The whole room was laughing.

After our u/s we went to our favorite place for a yummy breakfast, then we headed home to freshen up. I was excited to see what my sweet hubby had in store. We had decided that we would not buy gifts this year, but we always do cards. Sean suggested we exchange cards before heading out for the afternoon. My first card was a sweet and romantic one, but the second was one of those sound cards and when I opened it, it was playing "Two Tickets to Paradise", I was laughing because I had been singing that all morning in the shower for some reason.

At this point, Sean completely shocks me by announcing that he has planned a vacation for us as an anniversary/babymoon trip. Actually, he knows what a control freak I am, so he had a few different options planned out and let me have some input on the final decision and I am really thankful that he did that.

Our options were: #1- a 9 night Caribbean cruise that went to San Juan, Dominican Republic, a private island and St. Thomas. #2 - a 7 night Bahamas/Grand Turk cruise. #3 - an all-inclusive resort in the Caribbean. Sean was leaning towards option #1 since it was the longest trip and best value.

So which of these amazing vacations did I choose? None of the above. I know, I am a pain in the ass! Ungrateful even! Hear me out though. We have been on a cruise before and I found it to be an ok experience. I neither loved nor hated it as far as vacations go. My biggest concern was being on a ship in the middle of the Atlantic and needing medical attention beyond what the ship infirmary could provide. The cruise lines have very strict rules about pregnant women cruising and 23w is the cut off. We would be setting sail at 23w exactly and that was ok with permission from my OB.

I called the doctor's office and they said a cruise was fine, but to be advised that I was putting myself at increased risk of H1N1 and other illnesses because of the close quarters of a cruise environment. That kind of sealed the deal for me. I know the odds of something happening are slim, but also not out of the realm of possibility and I really was not comfortable being so far from modern medical care. Things like overheating and dehydration can happen so easily at this stage of pregnancy and though they are simple to treat, they can also require fetal monitoring and testing.

I felt much the same about an all inclusive resort on an island. Slightly better than a cruise, but not exactly state of the art medical facilities in the event of an emergency. So I apologized profusely to my hubby who had spent days and weeks researching options. He completely understood and said that is why he did not just go ahead and book something without my feedback. We put our heads together and came up with a compromise and found a pretty amazing deal in the long run.

We leave in 12 days for Key Biscayne, Florida. It is a small island just outside Miami and just what we are looking for - sun, sand, pool, spa, & relaxation. We are spending 7 days being pampered and spoiled by the ladies and gentlemen of The Ritz Carlton resort. We have vacationed at other Ritz locations and it is always an incredible experience. I really cannot wait! Our flight was CHEAP and the deal at the resort was really unbeatable - our breakfast, valet parking, & internet are all included daily, we got 2 nights free and a complimentary oceanfront room upgrade. Food can definitely get pricey so we plan to head to a grocery store and stock up on water, soda, snacks, fruit, etc... We even got a heck of a deal on a rental car. We may head into Miami for a day of shopping or dining, but we plan to mostly relax, relax, relax! It may not be exactly what Sean was originally thinking but I don't think it could have worked out any better. Now we just need to hope for great weather and NO hurricanes!

Do I have an amazing husband or what??? We spent the rest of the day on Friday playing tourist in our own city and then had a yummy dinner at a new steakhouse. The rest of the weekend was busy, but nice!

Now for a 20w1d belly pic and a pregnancy update!

How am I feeling? Dare I say, great?!?! I really do feel good for the first time in months.

How do I look? Pregnant! I feel really good in my own skin though and I definitely think I have lost weight everywhere but my belly. Not a great pic of me - it is so awkward to take belly pics!


Milestones? I am more than 1/2 way!!! Sean was able to feel the baby from the outside over the weekend and I am so happy that he can finally experience it. Movement felt from the outside is so weird!

Cravings? None recently

Aversions? Chicken

What do I miss? Nothing this week - feeling very content and grateful.

What am I looking forward to? Vacation and quality time with Sean. Registering - hopefully this weekend!

Weight Gain? Down five from the flu, but seem to be back to my pre-flu weight. The OBs scale showed no weight gain last month.

What do we think we are having? My gut feeling? A BOY! I will be in shock if this is a little girl.

I haven't stopped smiling in days. Feeling so very blessed and lucky...

Thank you and a pic!

Thank you all so much for your positive and supportive comments about our desire to have a natural childbirth in a birthing center environment. Even you 100% disagree with my choice and think I am stark raving mad for even considering it, I never would have known from the comments. I have to admit, I was bracing myself for a full spectrum of comments and I am happy to say that everyone was completely respectful. A big thank you to all the lurkers who came out of lurkerdom to lend support, ask a question, share a story or cheer me on!

To answer the question about where I found the statistics on C-section and episiotomy rates, my midwife provided them, but said they are available online. I have not tried, but I imagine they are not easy to find. Our midwife also told us that you can request your OB's stats directly from them and they are required by law to provide them. I am sure they have stats on the hospitals where they deliver as well.

My biggest advice to any pregnant woman, regardless of what type of birth you would like to have, is to educate yourself about what will happen to you. Ask questions, be informed, know what your OB's policies and stats are. I had NO IDEA that I had almost 50% risk of having a c-section by delivering at my local hospital! That was just not acceptable to me and scared the crap out of me!

Speaking of fear, many of you commented that you are scared to death of pain and natural childbirth. Honestly, I am scared to death of induction (which is far more intense than naturally occurring contractions), being literally strapped to a bed by 16 different monitoring/medical devices, being paralyzed from the waist down (freaks me out beyond belief), having my vagina cut and/or having a C-Section . Those are the things that cause me major anxiety! Natural childbirth is far less intimidating to me.

I am currently reading Pushed by Jennifer Block and I think it should be required reading for every woman long before she ever becomes pregnant. I am just blown away by the information in the book.

Ok, on to some fun stuff.

18w Summary

How am I feeling? Last week was my worst week in awhile. I got sick many times and had the pleasure of vomiting in public again. Sean & I had lunch at a local Mexican place and I thought I was keeping it simple by having soup and a cheese quesadilla, but apparently the baby did not agree. It was NOT pleasant and I was apologizing profusely to the other ladies who had the unfortunate luck of having to use the restroom at that moment.

How do I look? You be the judge! As promised, here is a long overdue belly pic.


This was taken at 18w exactly and according to my mother, I look exhausted. I think the belly looks huge and it is hard to believe that it has a lot more growing to do!

Milestones- I am definitely feeling the baby moving! It is the most wonderful feeling. I would describe it as a fish swimming, butterfly wings flapping or a thumping feeling depending on the movement. I feel Ralphie several times per day now and I can't wait until it gets stronger and Sean can feel it too!

What am I craving? Lots of peanut butter and eggs this week. I must need the protein!

Aversions? Apparently, Mexican food and I no longer get along. I don't think it is a coincidence that both times I have been sick in public, I have eaten Mexican food. I have not gone near chicken in months and don't plan to.

What do I miss? Really enjoying my food. I am apprehensive about eating many foods because I am afraid of getting sick. When something does taste good, (and it that is rare) I am only able to eat small portions as I get full very fast.

What am I looking forward to? Starting the nursery! Our plan is to order the furniture next weekend.

Weight gain - We will see what the OB's official scale says on Monday, but according to my scale, I am up 7lbs total since transfer, but only 2lbs since my 1st appt at 8w. I feel like I have lost weight in my face and the rest of my body, but my belly is absolutely growing and changing.

Discovery of the week? Amazon's Universal Registry!!! I am obsessed. I never knew this existed. I love that I can add any item from any website on the planet and have it on one registry. I have been able to register for a hard to find Graco pattern, cloth diapers, boutique items etc...We still plan to register at a local BRU for convenience, but I am in love with Amazon :)

I hope everyone is having a great weekend!

So much to say

I know, I know, I disappeared again and for a long time. I am so sorry! On an almost daily basis I think about something to blog about, but I never actually sit down to write. I want to, I really do!

We have been pretty busy this summer - weddings, parties, cookouts, traveling to Buffalo etc... We spent the holiday weekend in Buffalo celebrating our Goddaughters' birthday parties and attending a family reunion on my Dad's side. It was a great trip and a wonderful reminder of how much love and support is awaiting this baby. We received some adorable baby gifts. My mom bought some super cute sleepers and onesies and my aunt from Ireland knitted a beautiful blanket and hat. It was exciting to get our first gifts!!! My mom also won one of those small, Fl.ip video cameras at a golf tournament and she gave it to Sean as a Father's Day gift. It is so cool! It is an HD video camera that is the size of a digital camera. Perfect for posting cute videos of the baby! All in all, it was a wonderful weekend and reinforced to us that Buffalo is where we want to raise our family.

Our plan is still to move back home and we are thinking it might be a possibility in about a year or so, but it really depends on Sean's new job and whether or not they can work out way from him to telecommute. Now that my mom is awaiting the birth of her first (and possibly only) grandchild she is anxious for us to come home, or else she said she might have to move here! That would be incredible, but we ultimately want to be back in Buffalo with our entire family.

Speaking of the grandparents, my mom, step dad and Sean's parents have booked their flights to come down for Ralphie's birth!!! Even though it is still months down the line, my Christmas Eve due date really complicates travel arrangements. Sou.thwest had $49 flights and they book really fast due to the holiday, so when they saw available, cheap flights they booked them. They are all going to arrive on 12/23 - one day before my EDD. My in laws are planning to stay one week and my parents are staying two. There is really no way to predict if the baby will come early, late or right on time. We figured at least, they have their tickets and if I go early, they can always exchange them. If I go late, they are already here to celebrate the holiday and if I am right on time - even better! Driving really wasn't an option because Sean's mom hates traveling by car (the women has panic attacks in the car for 20mins, let alone 7 hours) and the weather in December is too unpredictable going through those mountains in PA. I wasn't crazy about my mom driving like a maniac trying to make it in time & running the risk of missing the birth all together if I went fast, they hit bad weather etc... I feel better knowing they have a plan!

In other baby news, Sean & I have started really thinking about our major baby purchases. We spent all day Saturday at Great Beginnings (rated as one of the best baby stores in the country by B.aby Bargains) near DC and it was so much fun. Overwhelming, but fun. The place is HUGE! The furniture showroom was incredible - they must have had 75 nursery sets on the floor. Every name brand and some hard to find ones too. We have narrowed our furniture choices down to two and hope to order in the next two weeks. The salespeople were incredible. They were truly experts in their field. Looking at car seats and strollers was like shopping for a new car - the salespeople were that knowledgeable about the products. Getting close to making a decision there to - I am thinking stroller frame and either the Gra.co Snugride or Chi.cco Keyfit. After seeing the installation demo in store, I am leaning more towards the keyfit at this point. Gender neutral bedding is proving to be difficult and I have a possibility in mind, but want to go look at fabric as well. We are going to register right after our big u/s in a few weeks!

My family has booked my shower for October 25th and it feels like that is going to be here before we know it! I feel like time is flying by now that I am in the 2nd tri and there is so much to do to get ready for this little one's arrival. I can't wait to start pulling it all together!

I am officially 16w4d pregnant and here is a recent rundown.

How am I feeling? Still vomiting. It is less frequent - only once a week or so now, but I wish it would stop for good. I feel like I have more energy, but can still sleep like a champ. I am finally off progesterone and estr.ace and am having massive mood swings. I am not sure if it has anything to do with being off the meds, or if it is just pregnancy, but it has hit me hard. I have been pretty even keeled up until the past few days and now my hormones are all over the place. Mad, sad, angry, happy, giddy...all in the span of a few minutes. Poor Sean!

How do I look? Pregnant. Perhaps I will post a belly pic in coming weeks. My family was surprised how much my belly had changed since Memorial day weekend. I don't feel like my body is changing anywhere else - just a round belly and bigger boobs.

Milestones? I *think* I may have felt movement a few days ago, but I cannot be sure. I was sound asleep and had been laying on my right side for about 6 hours straight. I was just stirring because I had to pee and roll over. As a rolled over to my left side, it felt like something did a huge somersault in my belly. My eyes flew wide open and my hand went right to my belly. I have never felt anything like it, but I haven't felt it since either, so I am really not sure. I am anxious to feel movement more frequently though!

What is Ralphie up to? Growing so big and strong! He or she is the size of an avocado - far cry from my little poppy seed - and weighs almost 4oz. He or she is urinating, has taste buds, is hiccuping, may be sucking its thumb and moving like crazy.

What am I craving? Potbelly Italian Sandwiches - YUM! Subway Veggie Subs.

Aversions? Chicken

What do I miss? Wine. A perfectly chilled glass of white wine on a hot summer's night. A rich pinot noir with a steak fresh off the grill.

What am I looking forward to? More movement, registering, ordering the furniture, and starting the nursery.

Weight gain? Officially, just 1lb. That is according to my OBs scale, but I did not have my first appt with them until 8w and between 4-8w I gained 3-4 lbs. So, unofficially, I am up closer to 5lbs, both me and my OB are fine with it.

What am I reading? What to Expect..., Your Preg. Week by Week, Bab.y Bargains, and Ina May's Guide to Chi.ldbirth.

Speaking of Ina May's book, although I like my OB practice, I am planning on touring a birthing center in the next few weeks. I have always wanted to experience natural childbirth and based on a few of the docs comments, I am not sure how supportive they would be. Additionally, Sean is concerned about how far my OB and the hospital is - almost in hour in no traffic and good weather. The birthing center and the hospital they are affiliated with are only 15 minutes away. I am planning a more detailed post on this topic in the future.

I think that wraps things up - sorry so long, this what happens when it has been 3 weeks since I last updated! Oh! One last thing, please stop by Meinsideout's blog and wish her HUGE congratulations! She is one of the biggest cheerleaders in the blogosphere and she has good news to share. She could also use thoughts, prayers and good vibes that this is her sticky miracle.

Adventures in Pregnancy

Helllloooooo 2nd trimester! How very exciting to be here! I feel like we have checked a huge milestone off the list. I wish I could say I was feeling better, but let me share with you how I kicked off the 2nd tri...

Sean & I went out for a quick dinner at Ch.ipotle last night. I have only had it twice since I got pg and it has definitely left me gaggy in the past, but I thought that had more to do with my chicken aversion than anything else. I am only feeling luke warm about red meat and chicken is an absolute no, so I played it safe and ordered a veggie burrito bowl. It was a beautiful night so we decided to dine on the patio. We are eating and chatting when all the sudden my stomach started flipping and churning. I held my hand up for Sean to be quiet and he must have known because he said, "There is a trash can right behind you!" I bolted from my seat and promptly horfed into the public trash can. So much fun, I cannot even tell you. Needless to say, I threw away the rest of my dinner and Chi.potle is off the list for me. Sean said I turned 3 shades of green before all the color drained from my face completely. We had a good laugh about it later! I have no idea what my body rejected about it, but the baby is clearly not a fan! Thank goodness Chipot.le was not a Father's Day dining hot spot and there were not too many people around. It was still embarrassing though.

The night before we dined at our favorite Greek place and I almost lost it there too, but that was directly related to tempting fate and eating a bite of chicken. I have always been a morning barfer so this past week of evening sickness is messing with my head. My food aversions definitely seem worse and barfing in public is definitely a new low for me! So much for the 2nd tri! :)

Sean had a nice Daddy-to-be Day. I bought him a digital picture frame for his office and we went out to lunch and to buy new cell phones. He got an iphone and he is enamored with it! I don't think he put it down all day. He even downloaded the pregnancy app - too cute! I finally got a phone with a full keyboard and even though I am lusting after his phone, I am pretty happy with mine too. We also decided to poke around Babies R Us a bit after lunch. We had fun looking at all the gear and deciding what we might like. You should have seen us trying to get the infant seats out of the strollers - we are hopeless! Sean found a teeny-tiny jean skirt that had him all
a-twitter. He thought it was the cutest thing he had ever seen. I have waited so long to wish my husband a Happy Father's Day - it was like a dream come true. I cannot even imagine what next year will be like when our son or daughter is here to celebrate with Daddy!

In other news, I finally changed the title of my blog and updated some info in the side bar! Big accomplishments for a self-proclaimed blog slacker!

I am also very excited to tell you that my best friend, Amanda, is also pregnant! Not only are we pregnant at the same time, we are due just 10 days apart! It is a girl's dream to share a huge milestone in her life with her best friend. I do pity our husbands though. We are going to be a site to behold!

In other pregnancy news, there are BFPs to celebrate so pop on over and visit Sprogblogger and Bella and share in their happy news!

We have a wedding to go to this weekend and I have NO idea what I am going to wear. I am also nervous about my new "barfing-in-public-while-dining" trick. Can you imagine??? Oh the horror! I would DIE!

Less than 3 weeks to go before I go off of Estrace and Endometrin. I have no idea why, but my RE wanted me to stay on them until 16 weeks. It feels like overkill to me, but I'll do what I gotta do!

Ok, I have not done one of these in a few weeks, so, in honor of the 2nd tri, here is my summary...

How am I feeling? I think we have covered that in detail ;) I have been sleeping A LOT - 12 hours on some nights minus the 10 trips to the bathroom.

Milestones: Second trimester - woo-hooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What is Ralphie up to? He or she is about the size of a peach and weighs around 1oz. The baby may be sucking its thumb and is practicing breathing in & out.

What am I craving? Pizza, pizza, & more pizza! Honey nut Cheerios.

Aversions: Chicken and Chipotle

What do I miss? My sex drive is still MIA. Hoping it will kick into high gear as I get into 2nd tri! I think coming off the Estrace will help too! Hoping, hoping, hoping ;)

What am I looking forward to? Oh! So much! I am so excited about this trimester. I can't wait to feel the first flutters & movement! Registering, the big u/s (even though we are not finding out the gender), getting a distinct baby bump, & feeling better (hopefully) just to name a few things!

That about wraps it up! Despite the m/s, I am overjoyed to be pregnant and trying to enjoy every moment. It feels more real every single day and I am looking forward to all the milestones that await. Thank you all for sharing this journey with me...

Birthday, Baby Clothes and Bleeding. Oh my!

Wow! Just when I say I am going to make an effort to be a better blogger, I disappear for almost 2 weeks. Sorry!

We had a wonderful time in Buffalo visiting with family & friends. In fact, Sean & my parents threw me a surprise party for my 30th birthday. I was truly surprised and had a great time catching up and celebrating with everyone. The party was in my parent's yard - we had tons of yummy picnic food, cake, desserts, games and fun. I told them it is a good thing I am pregnant and totally distracted or I would have totally been on to them! I thought my in-laws were coming over for dinner and spent the first few minutes that guests arrived being very confused and thinking people were being rude for showing up unannounced! HA! They decided against the traditional "surprise" where we walk in and everyone is already there because they didn't think they could pull it off and did not want to give me a heart attack. Instead, they had people all arrive at a certain time - I was certainly surprised! It was wonderful!

I received some really thoughtful gifts including lots of gift cards for a maternity clothes, barnes and noble gift cards, a beautiful sterling silver bracelet engraved with the word "Believe", tickets to the symphony and a gorgeous Blue Topaz pendant - the baby's birthstone - which totally takes my breath away every time I see it.

I never thought 30 would feel so good. It was the best birthday in many, many years. I feel like all of our dreams are coming true...

While we were home, my sister-in-law had me go through all of her maternity clothes. She has had 3 pregnancies & had a ton of clothes in every size and every season. She is a tiny person, so there wasn't a ton that was going to fit, but I took all her XLs and have a decent amount of stuff to go through & try on. She is done having children and had 6 bins of baby clothes set aside for me!!! She has 3 girls and the clothes are amazing! All Gymboree and she has the entire line for each collection - hats, shoes, tights, hair bows etc.... There are HUNDREDS of outfits from 0-18mo. If "Ralphie" is a girl, she is going to be set with clothes for a very long time! There is a decent number of gender neutral sleepers and a few outfits that could work either way. Even if Ralphie is a boy, I am keeping the bins in storage in case girls are in our future because the stuff is just too cute and in too good of shape to get rid of. It is crazy to have bins of baby clothes in my own house in my baby's nursery! She also gave me a few toys and a pack & play to keep at my mom's house. We made out like bandits and are so thankful to Alison for all the goodies!

I was lucky enough to feel fantastic during our entire trip home - Ralphie was really cooperating for me! It was the best I had felt in a few weeks, in fact I thought maybe the ICK and m/s was behind me, I was wrong, but it was nice to feel good for 4 days.

This past week has not been as smooth. I started having some spotting on Friday morning and it lasted on & off all weekend. It seemed to come on first thing in the morning either right after vomiting or right after putting in my suppository. I would get right on the couch, drink my water and it would subside. I was not too concerned because it wasn't heavy and there was no cramping, but it was a little unsettling. My mom made me promise that if I had any more spotting that I would call the OB right away. Monday morning there was another episode so I called and they wanted to see me right away.

The OB did an internal and there was no sign of active bleeding and there was no blood in my urine. My cervix was closed and looked "great." She told me right off that bat that she was sending me to have a u/s "just in case" and that she was going to try to find the hb with the doppler. She warned me that with my retroverted uterus and being a little fluffy in the middle that she may not be able to find it. She told me not to freak out, but that was easier said than done. After an agonizing few minutes, we all breathed a sigh of relief as she located the baby's heartbeat at a strong 161bpm. She said that was a great sign, but that she still wanted to me to go for the u/s. Her two theories are that the supps are irritating my cervix and/or I am rupturing blood vessels when I vomit. JOY!

I was not able to get in for a u/s until yesterday, but it was AMAZING! By far, the coolest one yet. Ralphie was super active and moving around and swimming like a fishy. I could not believe how much the baby was moving! I heard the h/b which is always music to my ears. I could not believe how much Ralphie has grown in just a little more than 2 weeks. Our u/s tech was so thorough and my u/s was so long. I could have stared at that screen all day long! She printed out 5 super cute pics for me to show off to family. The bleeding was scary, but it was almost worth it to get another peek at the baby. Next up, my NT scan in just about a week!

Here are some pics: the first one is a front view of the face. Honestly, it is a little alien like and maybe even a little creepy, but a face mother could love :) I do love the way he seems to be waving or saluting us. The second one is the side profile and just cute as can be! It says "BOY" to me all the way for some reason.

I missed my 9 week summary & since I am 10w6d today, I will do a combined summary.

How am I feeling: It really depends on the day. I am still getting m/s first thing in the am and feeling pretty tired. The nighttime waking to go pee is super annoying!

Milestones: Seeing the baby move like crazy! Oh & turning 30!

What is Ralphie up to? He or she is the size of a small plum this week and measured over 4cm on u/s. Bones are hardening, nails & hair are growing. He or she will respond to poking and prodding.

What am I craving? Oranges, cucumbers, chocolate milk.

Aversions: Nothing recently

What do I miss: Still missing my sex drive. Last seen sometime in early April. Hoping to have sex sometime in the next few weeks...

Quotes of the week: 1. said at my party by a family friend, "I think now that you have gotten pregnant, you aren't going to need IVF anymore. It happens all the time, you know. When the baby comes you won't have time to focus on getting pregnant and it will just happen. You never know!" I tried to explain that me being pregnant has no impact on Sean's sperm count, but about half way through I just decided to save my breath... #2 said by none other than MY HUSBAND! "I think you are talking yourself into throwing up, it's mind over matter!" Seriously??? Because I enjoy gagging and dry heaving and throwing up bile for 5 minutes straight! He is in the dog house!

A week from today is my last day of tutoring for the school year. It is a busy time - exams start tomorrow! Next Thursday, Sean & I leave for Dewey Beach for 5 days and when we come back I start my summer tutoring. I am excited for the beach and looking forward to some r&r, sunshine and shopping!

I cannot believe the school year is over and June is here. Time is flying! C'mon 2nd tri!

Finally, a new post!

I have probably sat down to write some version of this post 5 different times, but something always gets in the way. I have been tired (oh, so tired) and busy, but I am just up from a nap and find myself with a few hours before work. Heck, I even managed to make dinner tonight - it has been a very good day!

First, I want to wish every one of my readers a Happy Mother's Day. I know it is a tough day for many of us and for many different reasons. As Jill said in her latest post, I feel each one of us is already a mother in our hearts. Why else would we go through hell and back to have a child? So whether you are already a mom, a mommy-to-be, mommy to an angel, or a mother in your heart I wish you many blessings today. May all your dreams come true!

My "first" Mother's Day as a mom-t0-be was nice, but busy. I received many sweet cards from family and friends and my mom sent me a gift card to Mothe.rhood Maternity (just in time, might I add!). Sean bought me a sweet card and wrote notes from him, Libby and the baby. It was very sweet. I had to work for a few hours in the morning and then we went to a cookout at my aunt and uncle's house. I missed my Mom a lot today and wished we had planned a trip to Buff.alo to see everyone. It was a day filled with many different emotions - awe, fear, disbelief, love and hope. I can't believe I am finally pregnant; there is another heart beating inside my body and a little baby growing big & strong everyday. It is pretty awe inspiring!

Sean continues to pamper me - cooking, cleaning, laundry, waiting on me hand & foot. He really impressed me yesterday by assembling some pretty spectacular fruit, veggie and cheese platters for Mother's Day. He is so protective and I love it. Every night he gives me a belly rub with Burt's Bees Mama Bee Belly Butter and talks to the baby. It is the sweetest thing.

Some of you have asked why we are calling the baby Ralphie and/or Baby Saucy. My stepfather named the baby Ralphie within a day of finding out I was pregnant. I have no idea why, but it could be the Christmas due date/A Christmas Story connection. It has kind of stuck, especially for my family. Saucy is Sean's nickname. He is a redhead and a few years back a coworker from South America started calling him Saucy because in his country they call redheads "Sauceheads". To say that stuck would be an understatement, in some circles, he is exclusively known as Saucy or Sauce. I would love, love, love a little redheaded baby!

I am 7w4d today and here is a weekly summary:

How am I feeling? Tired and a strong sense of "ICK". Not really nauseous, but a very unsettled tummy. Oh the bloat!! None of my pants button and if it wasn't for the belly band, I would be a miserable momma. Hair & nails growing, growing, growing!!

Milestone of the week: Far & away - seeing the baby's heartbeat (although technically that was 6w5). I have my 1st OB appt this Friday and hoping to sneak another peek!

What is the baby up to? He or she is the size of a blueberry and growing fast. He/she is busy growing arms & legs. Pigment has developed in the eyes and the baby already has an appendix and a pancreas. He or she is 10,000 times larger than the day of conception.

What am I craving? Not too much - waffles sounded really good today. Most things sound good, but I change my mind a few bites in.

Aversions? Applesauce, gum and seafood.

Weight gain: +2lbs

Discovery of the week: Baby Bargains Book 8th edition. A mommy friend sent it to me last week and I big, puffy heart LOVE it! I am easily overwhelmed by large purchases and this book breaks it all down. I can't wait to start shopping - c'mon 2nd tri!

What do I miss? My sex drive and red wine *sigh*

Quote of the week: Sean upon observing the nighttime bloat, "Oh my God! You are gonna be HUGE!!!" LOL! Thanks, babe! ;)