YIKES! I am so out of practice! It took me a solid 20 minutes to log in and an obscene amount of time to update my template and I still have a weird pic of a cat that I cannot get rid of.
People aren't joking when they say motherhood steals your brain cells! Maybe I should have my 6 year old customize my template for me?!
To answer the question many of you posed in the comments, we are very much still unsure if our family is complete. Right now, we need to focus on our health. I have very much neglected taking care of myself since I became a mom. I am at an all time high weight and just not feeling great about it. As a result, my cycles are wonky again and I truly cannot imagine being pregnant right now. We spent Spring Break in Baltimore visiting friends and family last week. Walking the harbor with the kids, left us sore and feeling old! If we are going to add #4, we need to be able to keep up or we are surely doomed.
A big thing that has changed for me and brings me great joy is that I am a business owner. I have been blessed and lucky enough to stay home for the past 6 years, but it has not been without stress and sacrifice. Sean works extremely hard to provide for our family, but also works in a field with unpredictable income. He was under a lot of stress at work and ends were just not meeting at home. We knew we needed to do something, but daycare x3 was out of the question as was me working nights and weekends. We had worked way to hard to build a family and I was not about to give up on my dream of being a stay at home mom.
Sean has always been very entrepreneurial and is always looking for the right opportunity or franchise. Thankfully, last spring, that opportunity found us and it has been incredible.
We partnered with the doctors who created the acne medication, Proactiv, in the 1990s . Doctors Katie Rodan and Kathy Fields launched their own anti aging premium skin care line and we decided to jump on board once we saw the magnitude of the opportunity. We offer skincare solutions to all your concerns - anti aging, sensitivity, sun damage and yes, acne.
If you had asked me 6 years ago if I would be a stay at home mom to three kids and selling skincare, I would have laughed in your face. Laughed and laughed and laughed until I cried. I was a Target skincare girl - if you can even call it skincare. I would wash my face with generic wash when I was lucky enough to catch a shower and then I'd put on Target brand sunscreen and call it a day. Skincare was not a passion of mine.
Yet, here I am. This has been the perfect fit for me. It has given us the ability to make ends meet again and reduced our stress enormously. I have been able to take over paying the mortgage, both car payments and preschool tuition x2 thanks to my job as a consultant with R+F. Taking Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University has enabled us to put our residual income to work for us!
It has also given my self confidence a huge boost - for so long I felt like my identity was my infertility and then it was all tied up in being pregnant and becoming a mom. As much as I loved being a new mom to 3 kids under 3, it was very isolating at times. For the first two years, my social life involved going to Target alone or with my mom for a couple hours. Once my littles started preschool and I was connecting with other moms, I realized how much I missed interacting with adults and using my brain for something more than figuring out who ate last and how to potty train a toddler.
Now, I connect with men and women all over the U.S. and Canada every single day. I lead a team of over 50 people and I consider them among my closest friends and cheerleaders. This job is the most fun I've ever had and it fulfills me in a way that I didn't know I was missing. My glowing skin also helps my self confidence and forces me to take a few minutes to myself every night to wash and practice a little self care.
My only regret is not finding this opportunity sooner. I sometimes day dream about how invaluable it would've been during my infertility struggle. Not only would it have been a way to help fund some treatment, but my infertility would've been a BIG part of my why. Now, my kids are my why and creating time and financial freedom drive me to succeed in this business. Our ultimate goal is also to retire Sean from his full time job and we are on track to do that.
Let me close by telling you a little bit more about these kiddos that I am lucky enough to have call me their mom!
Eliza is 6 and in kindergarten. She is a typical first born and little mama to everyone. She is wise beyond her years. She is responsible and independent and so loving. Everyone says she is my mini me.
Lydia is 4 and her 2 year old teacher nicknamed her Sassy Pants. It stuck and she has proved it to be very accurate! She is my wild child! She is funny and has an incredible imagination. She is going to set the world on fire!
Owen is 2 and my littlest love. His favorite color is pink and he wants to be just like his sisters (who he adores). He is smart and never stops talking. He loves me something fierce. Now, I understand what everyone says about a mom and her son.
So, that's a little snapshot of my life these days. I am going to try to better about blogging because the time is going so fast and I want to remember every moment.
A chronicle of our journey from infertility to parenthood.
Showing posts with label weight loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weight loss. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 30, 2016
Sunday, April 5, 2009
FET Madness - Day 18 - Thaw Day
This morning I had to go feed the vampires to have my P4 checked. While we were there I asked if our embryologist was available to talk to us about the thaw. She came right out & said she had good news to report - all 6 frosties survived the thaw! Sean cracked a joke and said, "Yeah, we're from Buffalo. They like the cold." :)
She went on to explain that their definition of a successful thaw is if 50% of the embryo's original cell mass survives. All 6 passed with flying colors! Some maintained 100% of their cells and most lost just one cell. I don't have the specs in front of me, but we have 6 embies ranging from 5 cells - 10 cells. They do not grade them at this early stage, but they were all good quality going into the freezer. We get our next report @ 11am tomorrow! That report will dictate whether we go for transfer on Tues or Weds. We are getting excited!
I am feeling pretty good, but a few side effects are creeping up on me. The bloat has set in & I have been having a touch of insomnia from the prednisone. I started the doxy antiobiotic this morning and had a bit of heart burn from that. Of course, I am a goopy mess from the Endometrin. JOY! Ah well, I will take this any day over the stress and crummy side effects of a fresh cycle.
I do not think I am going to make my weight loss goal of 20lbs before transfer and I have made peace with that. I am still holding on @ 16lbs lost and I feel good about it. I kinda hit a plateau the last 3 weeks and the meds are not making it easy this time - I think it is the addition of the steroids.
In other related news, we had an interesting weekend. A good friend of mine (I wrote about her pg announcement here) had her baby on Friday afternoon and we decided to be brave and head to the hospital to visit with the new family on Saturday. I knew I was in the right mindset to do it and I really wanted to be there. I wasn't sure how I might be feeling about going during the 2ww hell or god-forbid after a negative beta, so I figured a visit now when I am feeling happy & hopeful was a good thing. I am glad we went. The baby is beautiful and I am so happy for E & S. It felt good to snuggle a newborn for a little bit and let myself pretend this might be us in 9 months or so...
The night the baby was born, I received a special message from Jeanine, an acquaintance E & I both have in common. We both taught her boys in elementary school and have stayed in touch over the years via fac.ebook. Jeanine struggled with multiple miscarriages almost 20 years ago and now has a beautiful family and is one of the kindest women I know. She took a moment out of her day to send me this message:
Hi!! Thinking about you tonight--I know when we were having trouble holding onto pregnancies, it was always hard when our friends had babies--even though we were so happy for them it made us yearn for a baby that much more! I know it won't be long until we are sending well wishes your way! Just wanted you to know that I am thinking about you and can't wait to celebrate your little miracle!! Keep good thoughts!!!
It was one of the sweetest and most touching things anyone outside of my immediate circle has ever said to me. I was bawling when I read it. It was so amazing to know someone was thinking of me and my struggle at a time when we were all celebrating E & S and their new baby. I was over the moon for E & S, but it was bittersweet too, which I know I don't have to explain to anyone reading. I feel blessed to have such a wide network of love and support. Jeanine sent me another touching message today to say how excited she was to hear about the thaw. She just totally gets it, she has never forgotten pain and loss even though it was more than 20 years ago. She touched my heart this weekend.
Lots more to say, but I am pooped! I will save it for tomorrow's frostie update.
Thinking of my little embies tonight and hoping they are warm and toasty and growing so big & strong. Can't wait to bring them home...
She went on to explain that their definition of a successful thaw is if 50% of the embryo's original cell mass survives. All 6 passed with flying colors! Some maintained 100% of their cells and most lost just one cell. I don't have the specs in front of me, but we have 6 embies ranging from 5 cells - 10 cells. They do not grade them at this early stage, but they were all good quality going into the freezer. We get our next report @ 11am tomorrow! That report will dictate whether we go for transfer on Tues or Weds. We are getting excited!
I am feeling pretty good, but a few side effects are creeping up on me. The bloat has set in & I have been having a touch of insomnia from the prednisone. I started the doxy antiobiotic this morning and had a bit of heart burn from that. Of course, I am a goopy mess from the Endometrin. JOY! Ah well, I will take this any day over the stress and crummy side effects of a fresh cycle.
I do not think I am going to make my weight loss goal of 20lbs before transfer and I have made peace with that. I am still holding on @ 16lbs lost and I feel good about it. I kinda hit a plateau the last 3 weeks and the meds are not making it easy this time - I think it is the addition of the steroids.
In other related news, we had an interesting weekend. A good friend of mine (I wrote about her pg announcement here) had her baby on Friday afternoon and we decided to be brave and head to the hospital to visit with the new family on Saturday. I knew I was in the right mindset to do it and I really wanted to be there. I wasn't sure how I might be feeling about going during the 2ww hell or god-forbid after a negative beta, so I figured a visit now when I am feeling happy & hopeful was a good thing. I am glad we went. The baby is beautiful and I am so happy for E & S. It felt good to snuggle a newborn for a little bit and let myself pretend this might be us in 9 months or so...
The night the baby was born, I received a special message from Jeanine, an acquaintance E & I both have in common. We both taught her boys in elementary school and have stayed in touch over the years via fac.ebook. Jeanine struggled with multiple miscarriages almost 20 years ago and now has a beautiful family and is one of the kindest women I know. She took a moment out of her day to send me this message:
Hi!! Thinking about you tonight--I know when we were having trouble holding onto pregnancies, it was always hard when our friends had babies--even though we were so happy for them it made us yearn for a baby that much more! I know it won't be long until we are sending well wishes your way! Just wanted you to know that I am thinking about you and can't wait to celebrate your little miracle!! Keep good thoughts!!!
It was one of the sweetest and most touching things anyone outside of my immediate circle has ever said to me. I was bawling when I read it. It was so amazing to know someone was thinking of me and my struggle at a time when we were all celebrating E & S and their new baby. I was over the moon for E & S, but it was bittersweet too, which I know I don't have to explain to anyone reading. I feel blessed to have such a wide network of love and support. Jeanine sent me another touching message today to say how excited she was to hear about the thaw. She just totally gets it, she has never forgotten pain and loss even though it was more than 20 years ago. She touched my heart this weekend.
Lots more to say, but I am pooped! I will save it for tomorrow's frostie update.
Thinking of my little embies tonight and hoping they are warm and toasty and growing so big & strong. Can't wait to bring them home...
Labels:
embryos,
estrace,
FET,
friends,
hope,
progesterone,
side effects,
thaw,
weight loss
Monday, March 23, 2009
FET Madness Day 5
Nothing too crazy going on. 4 doses of Estrace down and I was not having any side effects until last night when I woke up soaked to the bone. Ahhh...night sweats. Lovely.
We had a delightful weekend - fun, friends, food and relaxing. I maxed out on caffeine, spl.enda, red wine, sodium and nitrates. I probably gained 5lbs! I am back on the straight and narrow and off all the bad stuff - I am 5 days pregnant after all and wouldn't want to harm the frosties! Still my goal to be down 20lbs before transfer, so I've got some work to do.
The kids I tutor for are done with Spring Break, so it is back to regularly scheduled programming for me. I was really loving being home in the evenings with Sean - it is such a foreign concept to us. He has always worked super long days and would rarely get home before 9:30 and I usually tutor until around 9 myself. With spring break and Sean's new work schedule, we were beside ourselves! Oh well, only 3 more months of school and then on to summer schedule tutoring.
We are likely heading to Buffalo this weekend. Sean's oldest sister is having half of her colon removed on the 31st and the whole family is pretty stressed and nervous. We would like to spend some quality time with everyone before the surgery. We are praying for a good outcome and a speedy recovery for her!
Trying to focus on all positive things right now! I am so happy Spring is here and am anxiously awaiting warmer weather, flip flops and capris! The next month should fly by - we have a lot going on - Buffalo, transfer, family visiting for Easter, hopefully a BFP... (a girl can dream, can't she?)
Hope everyone had a fantastic weekend!
We had a delightful weekend - fun, friends, food and relaxing. I maxed out on caffeine, spl.enda, red wine, sodium and nitrates. I probably gained 5lbs! I am back on the straight and narrow and off all the bad stuff - I am 5 days pregnant after all and wouldn't want to harm the frosties! Still my goal to be down 20lbs before transfer, so I've got some work to do.
The kids I tutor for are done with Spring Break, so it is back to regularly scheduled programming for me. I was really loving being home in the evenings with Sean - it is such a foreign concept to us. He has always worked super long days and would rarely get home before 9:30 and I usually tutor until around 9 myself. With spring break and Sean's new work schedule, we were beside ourselves! Oh well, only 3 more months of school and then on to summer schedule tutoring.
We are likely heading to Buffalo this weekend. Sean's oldest sister is having half of her colon removed on the 31st and the whole family is pretty stressed and nervous. We would like to spend some quality time with everyone before the surgery. We are praying for a good outcome and a speedy recovery for her!
Trying to focus on all positive things right now! I am so happy Spring is here and am anxiously awaiting warmer weather, flip flops and capris! The next month should fly by - we have a lot going on - Buffalo, transfer, family visiting for Easter, hopefully a BFP... (a girl can dream, can't she?)
Hope everyone had a fantastic weekend!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Halfway to Nowhere
Well, I am about 1/2 way finished with my mock cycle. I had my lining check yesterday and my lining looked "beautiful!" I did not ask for measurements, because I figured why worry about something that does not matter anyway? I get to cut back my Est.race to 2x per day and I started Endo.metrin 3x per day this morning. Lucky me!
Although the mock cycle is easy and boring, I am not really a happy camper. The estrogen put the whammy on my sex drive in a major way and we all know how very romantic progesterone suppositories are to top it all off. Sigh... poor Sean. Poor me.
My endometrial biopsy is scheduled for next Friday the 13th. Looks like Valentine's Day weekend is going to be filled with romance. Sigh...
I stop all meds on 2/15 and call with a period. I can start FET right away pending results and we are leaning towards doing that.
I am down 10.4 lbs since the New Year and going strong. Losing about 1lb. per week for the last few weeks. I am hoping the meds don't blow me up like a balloon though. Sean is down almost 10 as well. I love cooking and am always looking for more healthy recipes!
We are new/used SUV shopping and it is maddening. I will spare you the details, but after spending Friday, Sat and Sun test driving trucks, I think we are getting closer to making a decision. We are terrible at making big decisions like this. We have a tendency to over think, over analyze and over plan things. Hopefully this weekend we will be the proud new owners of an SUV!
We are also making some headway on our "big life change" plans that I mentioned recently. I will unveil the plan soon. Thank you all for your well wishes and support!
Although the mock cycle is easy and boring, I am not really a happy camper. The estrogen put the whammy on my sex drive in a major way and we all know how very romantic progesterone suppositories are to top it all off. Sigh... poor Sean. Poor me.
My endometrial biopsy is scheduled for next Friday the 13th. Looks like Valentine's Day weekend is going to be filled with romance. Sigh...
I stop all meds on 2/15 and call with a period. I can start FET right away pending results and we are leaning towards doing that.
I am down 10.4 lbs since the New Year and going strong. Losing about 1lb. per week for the last few weeks. I am hoping the meds don't blow me up like a balloon though. Sean is down almost 10 as well. I love cooking and am always looking for more healthy recipes!
We are new/used SUV shopping and it is maddening. I will spare you the details, but after spending Friday, Sat and Sun test driving trucks, I think we are getting closer to making a decision. We are terrible at making big decisions like this. We have a tendency to over think, over analyze and over plan things. Hopefully this weekend we will be the proud new owners of an SUV!
We are also making some headway on our "big life change" plans that I mentioned recently. I will unveil the plan soon. Thank you all for your well wishes and support!
Labels:
endo biopsy,
estrace,
life changes,
mock cycle,
progesterone,
weight loss
Friday, January 16, 2009
Zen
So, I haven't been so great with the blogging lately. It is all because of my New Year's Resolution to use my time more wisely. The good news is that I am succeeding - getting up earlier, working out on the WiiFit, eating healthy, knocking out the to-do list etc... but that has resulted in much, much less computer time.
Using my time more wisely has been paying off. First, I picked up another tutoring gig 2 mornings a week and that pretty much guarantees me 20 hours a week or more. Second, I have been menu planning and cooking up a storm. We have not eaten out or ordered take-out in two solid weeks. One of my favorite changes is that I now cook dinner in the afternoon and then pack it up and take it to tutoring with me. Turns out eating dinner or take-out at 10pm is bad for the waistline and the pocket book- who knew??? I have lost 8.2lbs, Sean is down 3.5lbs and we have saved hundreds of dollars - seriously. I've even scrubbed the house top to bottom - baseboards and ceiling fans included!
I am feeling good. Really good. Better than I have in a long, long time. I feel healthier, I have tons more energy, I am more hopeful and positive than I have been in months. I am not obsessing over our upcoming FET or infertility in general. I am really at peace with where I am right this moment. It is a good feeling; a peaceful feeling.
I am hoping this feeling lasts, because I will be starting my mock cycle when my period arrives next week. That should take a full cycle to complete and that will leave us staring down the last week of February. I may start my FET right away and I might not. Depends on how I feel and where my head and heart are. All my bloodwork done in December -karotyping, prolactin, and fasting glucose- was normal. That's about all on that front.
I thought I would share my favorite recipes from this week. It is from Bob Greene's new Best Life Cookbook. I tweaked it a bit.
Best Life Bean & Sausage Pasta Soup
1 can white beans (canned, rinsed and drained) *I did 2 cans
3-4 links Hot Italian Turkey Sausage - slit casing and crumble meat
1 bay leaf
1 large carrot
1 onion
Lots of garlic -minced
1 red jalapeno - seeded and chopped
1/2 tsp rosemary
1/2 tsp sage
2 cups tomatoes - fresh or canned
2 cups greens (collard or escarole) washed well and broken into bite size pieces
32 oz reduced sodium organic Chicken Broth
1/2 box of Barilla Plus Elbow macaroni
1/4 tsp salt
Parmesan cheese to top soup
Add 1tbsp olive oil to pot- brown garlic, & onion and sausage. Combine all remaining ingredients, bring to a boil, lower heat and simmer 20 min. Cook pasta in salted water and serve soup over noodles. Parmesan cheese to taste. The original recipe calls for water instead of broth and does not include sausage.
Enjoy!
Using my time more wisely has been paying off. First, I picked up another tutoring gig 2 mornings a week and that pretty much guarantees me 20 hours a week or more. Second, I have been menu planning and cooking up a storm. We have not eaten out or ordered take-out in two solid weeks. One of my favorite changes is that I now cook dinner in the afternoon and then pack it up and take it to tutoring with me. Turns out eating dinner or take-out at 10pm is bad for the waistline and the pocket book- who knew??? I have lost 8.2lbs, Sean is down 3.5lbs and we have saved hundreds of dollars - seriously. I've even scrubbed the house top to bottom - baseboards and ceiling fans included!
I am feeling good. Really good. Better than I have in a long, long time. I feel healthier, I have tons more energy, I am more hopeful and positive than I have been in months. I am not obsessing over our upcoming FET or infertility in general. I am really at peace with where I am right this moment. It is a good feeling; a peaceful feeling.
I am hoping this feeling lasts, because I will be starting my mock cycle when my period arrives next week. That should take a full cycle to complete and that will leave us staring down the last week of February. I may start my FET right away and I might not. Depends on how I feel and where my head and heart are. All my bloodwork done in December -karotyping, prolactin, and fasting glucose- was normal. That's about all on that front.
I thought I would share my favorite recipes from this week. It is from Bob Greene's new Best Life Cookbook. I tweaked it a bit.
Best Life Bean & Sausage Pasta Soup
1 can white beans (canned, rinsed and drained) *I did 2 cans
3-4 links Hot Italian Turkey Sausage - slit casing and crumble meat
1 bay leaf
1 large carrot
1 onion
Lots of garlic -minced
1 red jalapeno - seeded and chopped
1/2 tsp rosemary
1/2 tsp sage
2 cups tomatoes - fresh or canned
2 cups greens (collard or escarole) washed well and broken into bite size pieces
32 oz reduced sodium organic Chicken Broth
1/2 box of Barilla Plus Elbow macaroni
1/4 tsp salt
Parmesan cheese to top soup
Add 1tbsp olive oil to pot- brown garlic, & onion and sausage. Combine all remaining ingredients, bring to a boil, lower heat and simmer 20 min. Cook pasta in salted water and serve soup over noodles. Parmesan cheese to taste. The original recipe calls for water instead of broth and does not include sausage.
Enjoy!
Labels:
FET,
healthy,
mock cycle,
new year's resolutions,
peaceful,
recipes,
time,
weight loss
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