Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Still Hoping

Today was 7dp3dt. I caved. I knew as soon as I brought those damn sticks in my house I was done. It was a BFN. I am not upset. A teeny-tiny bit disappointed, but not upset. My reason for testing was simple - there was an off chance it could be + and if so, I knew I could head up to Buf.falo much more relaxed. If it was BFN, I looked at it as a wash - no harm, no foul, still hopeful. So, here I am still waiting, still hoping, still praying for a miracle...

It was a quiet day. We drove up to NY and I had 7 hours to focus on my uterus. It has been kinda throbbing all day. Not really crampy, but twinges and throbs.

I am now officially pooped and it has nothing to do with symptoms and everything to do with getting ready for Turkey Day. Since we got in this evening, I baked Trader Joes Pumpkin Bread, made icing, peeled 15lbs of potatoes, made 2lbs of stuffing and the fresh cranberry sauce.

I won't test tomorrow, maybe Friday. My beta is still a week away, but Shad.y Grove tests late. If I was still at my old clinic my beta would be this Saturday - 3 days away! Knowing that, I will be pretty confident in my results by Saturday either way...

I am trying to keep perspective and remember that there is still a great deal to be thankful for this year. A wonderful supportive family, an amazing, loving, caring husband who also happens to be my best friend, the best dog in the world, great friends whom I consider my chosen family, a job I love, the ability to hope and to dream, an amazingly supportive network of bloggers and friends that I have met through the internet and so much more...

I wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving!!! I'll be thinking of each and every one of you!

13 comments:

Chhandita said...

You are such a brave woman...I derive strength from you..take care...praying for a BFP..

M. said...

Happy Thanksgiving! I hope Friday/Saturday brings a BFP! And welcome to Buffalo-- they really put you to work, huh? ;-)

Kristen said...

I am still keeping my fingers crossed for you!!! Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

sweetpeanme said...

Saying a little prayer for you and your little ones!! I have a question for you, I am a Marylander as well and was thinking about switching to Shady Grove...have you been happy with them so far? I feel like my dr. is not very supportive and sometimes he has no idea why I've come in for an appointment (perhaps he should glance at my chart before saying "hello"). I don't want to switch because I feel like it'd be taking two steps back, but I'm not really "feeling the love" from this guy. I'd love to hear from you!
Have a wonderful thanksgiving!

poppy.f.seed said...

have a great thanksgiving!
I agree, they test way late, I think it makes people more likely to test on their own! Keep yourself rested, if you can, give that baby time to settle in and get snuggly :)

Lisa said...

Hey girl - some women do not get bfps until beta so do not lose hope. I am still hopeful for you. Happy Thanksgiving!!

Lisa said...

And I will most definitely be thinking about you!!

Jill said...

Happy Thanksgiving! I hope to hear wonderful things on Saturday!

Jen said...

Fingers crossed for great news on Saturday!

Jill said...

Happy Thanksgiving, Em! I hope Saturday brings you and Sean a BFP! I can't think of any better news!!

Lost in Space said...

I'm hoping Friday or Saturday bring you the news of a lifetime. Everything crossed for you, Emily!!

Sky said...

I know you've heard a hundred times that it's too early. You know why? 'cause it is.

7dp3dt equates to 4dp6dt or 5dp5dt and the blogs are full of BFN's on those days which are BFP's two days later.

...just saying, don't pull up a chair to hear the fat lady just yet.

But all the same, wishing you the best!

Lisa said...

Hang in there!!! It won't be long now. But I know how incredibly hard it is. I'm so praying and hoping for you.

And thanks for all the support!!!! I can't beleive I finally got a BFP! Praying you will not be far behind me :)